DISASTEROUS DAY TRIP

Another day in paradise as they say with tongue fully in cheek.

We were 4 days away from our trip to Bulgaria to meet up with my parents and brother. A trip I had been anticipating for a long time. David announces that without my residency card as well as the children's, we would not be able to enter back into Romania. Here's where I started thinking of a bit of sabotage. "Sorry Mrs. Armstrong, We are going to have to send you back to Canada!" Oh dear that would be so awful... or would it.

Anyhow, he told me the lawyer from work had an idea of how to get the papers before we left and that she was coming over in the evening to let me in on the plan.

Anna-Maria arrived with her friend after work. She is a young woman probably still in her twenties and dressed up for her day at the office like we Canadians would dress for a wedding. Things are very formal here. She tells me she understands I must be lonely here and that she would like to take me and the 3 children to Piatra Neamt (40 minute drive away) to get the papers on Thursday. She also mentions her Mother, Father, Brother and cousin would be joining us. They would then take us on a tour of the city and show us a water park and things for the kids.
"Are there enough car seats for everyone?" I ask.
"Oh yes, we will take 2 cars. We have one big van we will take, Yes?!"

Now driving down a Romanian highway with David is hard enough but driving down a highway with people I don't know and don't know how fast they drive... well I was a bit worried.

David reminded me this was the only way as he was too busy at work to take me to Piatra Neamt and I needed those papers. Sabotage again crosses my mind. MUAHAHAHAHAHA

We agree that 0900 would be great timing and to be honest I just wanted to get back home as early as possible so I could pack.

Thursday morning came an email saying 1000 would be easier. No problem! At 0900 I got a message saying Anna had been called into work and that she would be here to pick me up at 1100 for sure. We were on the door step with car seats waiting by the gate at 1100 sharp. The time past as we tried to stay cool and out of the sun. The temperature was climbing and the weather man was calling for a day of sun with temps at 36 degrees in the shade. When 1130 went by I thought I was going to loose it and would have called off the trip but I needed these papers. Anna calls me at 1135 and apologizes for her tardiness and that she would arrive in 5 minutes.

Her car pulls up and she jumps out apologizing emphatically. Ruby is exhausted and crying in my arms as I have pushed her nap time so far back she is delirious. Then adults start to pile out of this car. Her friends Andre and Anna, her business partner and her partners daughter. "Okay, so I guess I'm not going in that I right!" I blurt out, frustrated.
She explains that there is another car coming and we will be joined by another woman and her daughter who come from the Congo. WTF!? Okay, fine, great. Another child for the kids to play with who might even be able to communicate with them because they speak french in the Congo. I am just hoping Gabrielle doesn't come out with one of her lines like, "why is your skin so black" God help me! The other thing I thought of was, I hope this van is big indeed.

A car pulls up with a Romania woman and a nine year old girl who looked much like her mother. She is married to a man from Angola. He is a diplomat for Angola for Eastern Europe out of Serbia. Wow, I thought. So where is the van?

"Oh the van is with my parents in Piatra Neamt." Anna explains. You are kidding. So it was expected that 2 adults and four children including my baby, fit into a car that was smaller than a civic. It ended up that this woman's daughter piled herself into the car full of adults in order to fit my kids. I had put Evelyn and Gabrielle's car seat away but I'm sorry, Ruby must be in a car seat. This took up too much room.

So it's just after 1200. Three hours behind schedule. We start driving but go the opposite way to where we are supposed to and stop in front of a house. Anna flies out of the other car and waves. Again WTF? Ten more minutes pass and she returns with different clothes on then runs over to our car and explains she just had to change her clothes. No shit.

So we are off again but then another quick stop. The other Anna gets out and tells us to go on without her. Too many people in the car she says. No doubt!

So I'm the passenger in a car with a woman I know nothing about. My children are in the back, Ruby fast asleep with mouth wide open and the big girls looking at me like, "Now what!" God bless them. They are so good to me and tolerant of this whole situation.

I ask the Romanian woman from Africa how she knows Anna the lawyer. She says, "Oh I met her friend on the train yesturday." Come again, I think. I asked if what she was telling me was that they have know each other for one day. She says yes. I might as well have just hitch hiked with my three children. Who is this woman? Get me out of here. I would never have agreed to this. I don't know this woman. I'm getting hot, my heart is racing so I try to stay calm and ask if we could turn on the AC.
"Oh, it doesn't work." She says like she couldn't care less. I look around the car and see that Ruby has beads of sweat gathering across her nose and Gabrielle is starting to whimper.
"Mommy, I'm really hot." She says looking very uncomfortable as the sun shone down on her head.

Romanians hate to open windows and cause drafts but at this point I couldn't care less. I rolled that window down as low as it would go and watched this woman roll her window up. "But the Baby," she says, "isn't it too windy?"
"She's fine," I snap at her. GET ME OUT OF HERE! WHY AM I HERE?

The air calms me and I am able to talk. I decide to enquire about what she does to keep herself busy. Oh God! Big mistake. For the next 40 minutes I was being sold a Pyramid Scheme. A vacation destination pyramid scheme out of Kenya. It is what she called "Network Marketing!" Yah, sure, I'll buy a scheme from Africa. What ever!! Get me out of here! David's ears must by burning off at this point.

We arrive at the police station and low and behold there is no parking. Anna jumps out of the other car and says,
"Just leave the kids with her and we will run in and get the papers."
This goes against everything I believe in, goes against every comfort, goes against all my instincts but I did it. God help me, I did it. I have left my 3 girls in a car with a strange pyramid scheme selling woman I don't know. Nor does Anna.

I run in the door of the Police station with Anna hot on my heels but she must have been wondering why I was running. "I trust you had a pleasant drive and good conversations?" she says breathlessly as we run up the stairs.
"Ya, fine. But too hot. She has no AC."

We get the papers and I am told by the Romanian police officer not to bring my passport with me to Bulgaria, only my residency papers as they are terrible corrupt people who hate outsiders.
Unbelievable, everywhere in the world you need to have a passport to get into another country, even Canada to USA and this joker tells me (through Anna the lawyer) not to take it. These people have rocks in their heads. I smile at him, fakely, and run out of the office before Evelyn signs any papers saying she will buy into the pyramid scheme woman.

Anna tells us we are going to McDonald's for lunch and I am relieved for my children. Finally they will get to do something fun and safe. We ate at the McDonald's as I watch all of them speak Romanian to each other and once in a while turn and smile at me. Finally they send the pyramid woman's daughter over to tell me that we are going to go to the water park now. Her English was very good so I could see why she had been selected.

We piled out of McD's a ridiculous 50 minutes after arrival and we switch cars. Now all the adults will go with the pyramid woman and I will be in the car with Andre. He is 21 and a Civil Engineering student at Iasi University. He is fluent in English and very friendly but most of all, his car has air conditioning. So we start driving along having comfortable conversation about Warren Buffet and Donald Trump when I realize we are in the middle of no where. I said,
"Where is this Water Park?" I ask, afraid of the answer.
"Oh we are not going to the Water Park. It is closed until weekend. We are going to a very beautiful Monastery that is about 40 mintues from here." he says.

Now I have some culture and can appreciate the age of buildings, the beauty of churches and their significance but my three children are bored by it all. If you were 6 or 4 and told you were going to a water park and you ended up at a big old church surrounded by stone faced Orthodox nuns what would you do? Cry, a lot! At this point, I thought I might cry too. Ruby starts to cry so much at one point we had to stop the car cause the 21 year old boy, for lack of a better word, could not handle the screams. He got out and had a smoke while I got the kids out to change their ideas and change Ruby's diaper.

The Monastery was beautiful and the grounds kept immaculate by the stone faced nuns. Honestly, I think it's against their religion to crack a smile. It gave me a very unwelcomed feeling. The girls, of course, started to run around and chase the wild dogs in efforts to play with them. I was given the hairy eye ball by a stone faced nun for letting my children do so. Now, I had to keep them quiet in a place they didn't want to be when they had been promised a trip to a water park. FANTASTIC! They busied themselves playing with a wild, playful, puppy who was adorable as I pretended to admire the grounds as I walked around the church with Ruby in the stroller. Finally I just sat down and played with the puppy too.

When it was finally time to leave, David texted me asking when we would be home. I told him where we were and that the kids were very tired. It was 5:45 pm and we had an hour drive home ahead of us. I wished I was a genie and could just blink us home, but I wasn't. So we piled into Andres car a started for home.

I felt myself wanting the car to go faster but I assumed it was because I just wanted the day to be over. Then Andre told me that just to be safe, since the kids were in his car, he had elected to drive only 50 kms/hr all the way home. On roads that David would normally whip down at 110 kms/hr. Very considerate, urgh!

We ended up having a very nice conversation about Romania. He was surprised to hear that we don't have horses to work in the fields in Canada. Only the Amish for the most part I told him. I don't think he believed me. He told me how he and other people of his age were going to save Romania from itself and all the communist officials who are just working under a different name. He told me he believes in The Secret and is going to be wealthy in only 4 years. He will then take care of his mother who took care of him all alone after his father died when he was 8. He would have a large family because he loves children and he would teach them a different way of thinking. Inspirational, is the word that came to mind. He really had conviction and I believed in him. I brought up the fact that the woman driving the other car is into "network marketing" and was going to go on and tell him how I disapproved when he told me he too is into "network marketing."

Oh god, here we go.

"I am the first man to sell these products in this country and I believe I will sell the most in the country even though I am a man." he explains.

I'm afraid to ask.

"I sell absorbents for women. My girlfriend has tried them, my sister has tried them and many of my friends. They all say they are so comfortable. The tampons are negatively charged, all natural and new cotton. No one wants recycled paper in their female parts." he states. My eyebrows go up and I pinch myself to see if I'm dreaming or if I really am have a conversation about tampons with a 21 year old student. ... it's real all right!

"The negative ions help the women so much in so many ways. It keeps the smell to a minimum and helps with symptoms of PMS."

God now I'm listening to him talk about smelly birds. What's next, clotting?

"We are having a conference this weekend with the head of my company. She is coming here to Roman from Switzerland. I would like you to come and see the product and see what you think." he says with a charming smile.

Just what I wanted to do on a Saturday, go to a tampon conference. Nope, I see enough birds at work thanks. I told him that unfortunately I was going to Bulgaria on the weekend and that I would not be able to join him. Shucks.

We got dropped off and waived goodbye to our new friends. Unfortunately the person I really wanted to get to know, Anna the lawyer, I hardly saw at all. We were hungry and tired and hoped that David had prepared us a supper. To end the day just as it started, he had made himself a sandwich and was watching soccer on TV. I know he had no idea what our day was like but really, I was disappointed. Later that night I told him how the day had unfolded and he was shocked. He assured me that Anna Maria was a very nice girl and that I would like her very much.

Maybe I'll try again some other time but I'll do the planning.

Have you ever known anyone from Bulgaria or who has been to Bulgaria.
Until next time,

Alison xxxxx

IN - LAW INVASION!!!

So we were back in Romania after a whirl wind tour of Northern England. Normally I would be depressed and sad to be back but this time we had Carole with us. Carole is David's Mum.

We contacted her before we were going to England and asked her if she would consider meeting us in Enlgand and then coming back to Romania with us. Like a woman on a mission, she had it booked the next day.

I couldnt wait to show her the place I was now calling my temporary home. I wanted to prove to her that I was not lying when I said the town is ugly with crumbling buildings everywhere. I wanted her to feel the tug of depression I felt when I first arrived here with my children and they saw their first splattered wild dog on the road. When I first say Roman, Romania it was the end of November. There were no leaves on the trees, no flowers, there was thick fog covering most of the city for most of the day. Everywhere you looked was grey. So when I went back to Canada with David and told my story of woe, some people didn't believe me. They told me to get over it, it's just for 2 to 3 years. Lots of people would kill for this opportunity they told me.

Take it! I thought. Take the opportunity if you want it so bad and stop telling me I'm a big baby and complaining. Everyone else in the free world complains when their life gets harder. When I walk by a grown man having a giant dump beside the sidewalk as people are walking by, I am going to complain that I don't want to be here. When I see grown adult and teenagers throwing logs and rocks at wild dogs just for shits and giggles, I am going to complain about it. I'm pretty sure everyone lese would too. When I have to explain why children are begging all over the streets everyday to my own children, I will complain that I have to do that!

Carole, however, never told me to grin and bear it. Its not her personality. She just listened and comforted as best she could. She's so wonderful to me. So here she was in Romania for the next 8 days. We drove home and past many splattered dogs, run down villages and garbage on the side of the road that she was already starting to get a flavor for what was to come.

We got home and invited Carole into our little house and I really think she liked it. It's homey and comfortable and cool which was great cause it was a blazing 35 degrees outside. I was so excited that I had company for the first time!!!

Trevor (my father-in-law), in the meantime, was working in Germany for his company. We got a call from him telling us he was going to fly into Bacau, which is really close, for the weekend. Now I was really excited! I was going to get a chance to have both of them here and show them around this... place and let them aquire an opinion of their own.

Carole and I spent the next day together and I learned all kinds of new things about her. She's Brave for one. We walked the kids to their morning school and because I was to meet my friend Brittany at the gym, Carole decided she would walk back to the house on her own with Ruby. Very brave given that their are many gypsies in this town who could scare you a bit if you aren't used to them. The key system to get into my house is also very difficult. Four keys in four different doors just to get inside. It can be very confusing! Not to mention the uncomfortable blazing heat of the sun sending the temperature in excess of 35 degrees. It was so great sitting outside in the afternoon and chatting with someone over an ice cold glass of water. On our walk to pick up the kids I asked Carole what she thought of the city and what she would have thought of it in November when I first visited.
"It would be bloody depressing!" she said and I could have kissed her!

Trevor arrived that night with David after not wasting a moment and shopping the deals on the way home. That is one great thing about Romania, you can get great deals on shoes here! We had a lovely meal all together again. It was really nice to have them with us. So comfortable and pleasant and easy.

I was excited to show Trevor around town. I wanted to show him the area called "The Hole" by the locals. It's an area of the downtown area where a cluster of old concrete apartment buildings are found together. Row after row with the centre of the complex dug out. It is... well lets just say the name hole suits it well. Trevor didn't believe me that the place was so bad so when he walked up to "The Hole" and had a look it was pretty easy to tell he now knew what I was talking about.

"They got a long way to go," he kept saying.

Yep, but I won't be here long enough to see it that is for sure.

We spent the next few days touring North Eastern Romania. Toured the painted monastaries of Bucovinia which was beautiful. You'll notice the men are wearing dresses. They were borrowed as you can't have exposed knees in the monastery. I think Trevor pulled it off though. LOL!

We also went hiking in the Carpathian mountains.

We treated the in-laws to a Romanian authentic supper which David loves but everyone else was kind of put off. Might of been when we saw David chewing his Tripe soup. Trev was a good sport anyway and got the mystery meat platter.

Trevor got a tour of David's steel plant and he came back home gob smacked.

"I haven't seen anything like that since... I'm not sure if I've ever seen anything like that," Trevor said. He was especially grossed out by the washrooms which are the old hole in the ground toilets and no one really cares if they hit the target. Infact many don't bother to walk to the bathroom and instead they just pee next to the machine they are working at. Why walk? What a waste of time! Yuck!

Trevor left Monday morning and we were sad to see him go. He had been a lot of fun. Carole left on Thursday and I felt myself sink down into a place I hadn't been yet. I was alone again with my girls all day long and many weekends too. David has been working so many hours to get his job done. I hope I see them again before Christmas.

But enough of feeling sorry for myself. I have something to look forward to. I will be meeting my brother and my parents in Bulgaria on the Black Sea for a beach vacation then my parents are coming to Romania for 2 weeks. Now more than ever, I can't wait!

It was never an in-law invasion. It was a pleasure!

Thanks Trev and Carole for coming and visiting. We had so much fun!

Love, Alison